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First, soften some buttah. I knew cookies were in my destiny yesterday morning when I woke up, so I took a couple of sticks of butter out of the fridge and set them on the counter. I didn’t know what direction I would head, and I didn’t care.

All I knew was, cookies would somehow be involved.


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Throw the butter into the mixer.


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Add two big ol’ cups of dark brown sugar.


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Then mix it around…


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Until it’s a big mushy bowlful of ridiculously delicious wonderfulness that’s you’d really like to spread on a piece of toast.


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Add some vanilla and mix it in…


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Then crack in an egg and mix it in.


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Scrape the sides…


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And beat in another one o’ dem egg thangs.


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Now, in a separate bowl add 1 1/2 cups of flour…


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A teaspoon o’ salt…


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And a halfa (also known as half of) teaspoon of baking soda.


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Add the dry ingredients…


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And mix them in until just combined.

And whatever you do, do NOT eat a quick spoonful of this dough. You will want to. You will want to real, real, bad. But you’ll hate yourself in the morning.

I speak from experience here.

*Burp*

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Now, since these are oatmeal cookies, it is somewhat important at some stage to add oats to the cookie dough. If you do not do this, you will no longer be making oatmeal cookies.

You’re at a crossroads, is what I’m saying. What’s it gonna be?

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I knew you’d do the right thing!

Oh, and that thing I said a second ago about not eating a quick spoonful of this dough? It’s even harder now.

(Go ahead. Sneak a bite. Hurry! They’re coming.)

Oh, and one more thing: You can add 1/3 to 1/2 cup finely chopped pecans if you’d like. I decided to leave them out and keep things more pure and holy…but nuts would be just lovely.

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Use a scoop or a spoon…


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To get the dough on the sheet pan.


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Then bake them at 350 degrees for 12-13 minutes, or until the cookies spread and start turning dark golden brown.

You can bake them a little longer if you want them a little darker and crispier. At 350, they won’t be in danger of burning too quickly.


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Hello, my beautiful love! Come away with me.


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You’ll love these cookies! They’re dark and magical, chewy and dense, delicious and delicious!


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When you’re finished playing around and making cookie castles out of them, serve them to someone you love.

I promise you they’ll love you right back!

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